rosey hussein violet X (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} roseyv) wrote,@ 2008-05-02 12:36:00 |
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Excuse me. Aren’t you Clark Bellinger?
Ah — yeah.
From DeFloret Consolidated High School?
Um … yeah.
Jenna Rooney. I was in your graduating class.
Oh! Right! Jenna Rooney! Holy cow. You look like shit.
I'm — sorry?
Wow! I mean, I get that it’s been almost twenty years but Jesus. Have some respect for yourself, for God’s sake. What the hell happened to you?
I … nothing happened to me. What are you talking about?
Look, I’m not trying to be cruel, or mean-spirited, or obnoxious or anything but my God you’ve let yourself go. I mean, I never liked you in high school, but back then at least you were fuckable. Didn’t anyone ever explain to you that when the only thing you have going for you is your looks, you need to hold on to them like grim death? Obsessive dieting, rigorous exercise, weekly Botox injections — isn’t any of this ringing any bells for you?
All right, you know what? I’m sorry I bothered you. I’ll just be on my way …
No, no no. Bothered me? Are you kidding? You just made my day. Jenna Rooney. The bitchiest bitch who ever bitched a bitch, and look how you ended up. You know I’m kind of flattered you even remembered my name. Back in high school, you used to have a funny little pet name for me, what was it? Oh, right? Spazzburger. Remember that? Those were good times, weren’t they? Not like today, though, I guess. God, this is sweet. Look at you! I’m guessing you married that dick Todd Peterman, squeezed out a couple of spoiled, thankless brats, let your figure go till he finally just left you for something younger and tighter, and now you’re … what? A greeter at Walmart? I’m just guessing by what I assume is the employee discount you got on that outfit. But what the hell? At least it keeps you in Cheetos, huh? Huh, there, lardass? Huh? How’s that prom dress fittin’ these days, huh? Maybe not so good? Huh? Huh?
…
…
…
You think I’m Jenny Rubin, don’t you.
What?
Jenny Rubin? Homecoming queen, captain of the cheerleading squad. In twelfth grade she burned down the chemistry lab, and the Administration called it “Performance Art” and put her in for an Eastman scholarship so she wouldn’t have to miss prom?
Jenny Rubin?
I’m Jenna. Rooney. President of the Rocks and Minerals Club? I caddied for you in remedial golf. My mom used to pick me up from school in a Dodge Dart Swinger?
A brown …
… Dodge Dart Swinger. Yeah.
Oh my God. Oh, wow. Jenna. Hey! You look great. No, really!! You haven’t change a … oh, shit. I am so sorry. You must think I’m the biggest asshole in the world.
Not even close, actually.
Ah — yeah.
From DeFloret Consolidated High School?
Um … yeah.
Jenna Rooney. I was in your graduating class.
Oh! Right! Jenna Rooney! Holy cow. You look like shit.
I'm — sorry?
Wow! I mean, I get that it’s been almost twenty years but Jesus. Have some respect for yourself, for God’s sake. What the hell happened to you?
I … nothing happened to me. What are you talking about?
Look, I’m not trying to be cruel, or mean-spirited, or obnoxious or anything but my God you’ve let yourself go. I mean, I never liked you in high school, but back then at least you were fuckable. Didn’t anyone ever explain to you that when the only thing you have going for you is your looks, you need to hold on to them like grim death? Obsessive dieting, rigorous exercise, weekly Botox injections — isn’t any of this ringing any bells for you?
All right, you know what? I’m sorry I bothered you. I’ll just be on my way …
No, no no. Bothered me? Are you kidding? You just made my day. Jenna Rooney. The bitchiest bitch who ever bitched a bitch, and look how you ended up. You know I’m kind of flattered you even remembered my name. Back in high school, you used to have a funny little pet name for me, what was it? Oh, right? Spazzburger. Remember that? Those were good times, weren’t they? Not like today, though, I guess. God, this is sweet. Look at you! I’m guessing you married that dick Todd Peterman, squeezed out a couple of spoiled, thankless brats, let your figure go till he finally just left you for something younger and tighter, and now you’re … what? A greeter at Walmart? I’m just guessing by what I assume is the employee discount you got on that outfit. But what the hell? At least it keeps you in Cheetos, huh? Huh, there, lardass? Huh? How’s that prom dress fittin’ these days, huh? Maybe not so good? Huh? Huh?
…
…
…
You think I’m Jenny Rubin, don’t you.
What?
Jenny Rubin? Homecoming queen, captain of the cheerleading squad. In twelfth grade she burned down the chemistry lab, and the Administration called it “Performance Art” and put her in for an Eastman scholarship so she wouldn’t have to miss prom?
Jenny Rubin?
I’m Jenna. Rooney. President of the Rocks and Minerals Club? I caddied for you in remedial golf. My mom used to pick me up from school in a Dodge Dart Swinger?
A brown …
… Dodge Dart Swinger. Yeah.
Oh my God. Oh, wow. Jenna. Hey! You look great. No, really!! You haven’t change a … oh, shit. I am so sorry. You must think I’m the biggest asshole in the world.
Not even close, actually.
